did i just write this in 10 mins and in the middle of the day????

Why is that nearly all blogs in the universe are about random thoughts and expression merely on depression and sadness and remorse. God, people in the world are depressed. Hell, I used to think that the whole blogging scenario are meant to communicate the different ways of improved living. That was the main reason why I joined it and giving my inputs. At the start, it was only for the mere pleasure of vanity but…..now, it has become a huge part of my life. Earlier, I used to wait for 4 in the morning, when the whole 4 A.M. miracle used to hit me hard. Now, I can write absolutely anytime I want. And about anything I want. Like, right now, I am blaming the blog communities worldwide that people out there are more depressed than I am. Guess, everyone is suffering. As the famous REM song goes: “everybody hurts, everybody cries”.

The thing I don’t understand and would probably never be able to understand is that happiness is so easy to find when you are depressed or remotely sad. Then why don’t people write then. I try hard to write something funny, something cheerful, something red and not blue…..but, I cant. Maybe, it’s the vanity thing again….but, no, I am pretty sure its not that rite now. I am genuinely sad. Well, I just came from my trip to the cigarette shop, so I am pretty sure I am not sad. Its something else which I can’t put my fingers on. Ah….this sucks.

I have friends to cheer me. I have parents to care for me. I have done pretty well in my academic life to not worry about. I have listened to the innumerable songs which I always wanted to. I have seen more movies than Kubrick himself. I have sung every song I wanted to. I have shagged enough and have had my share of sex. Then, what the hell is wrong with me. God, I can complain. And its not that great a feeling. Let me tell you that.

By now, the irony of the essay is profound. Look at it. First of all, I complain about the complains of all bloggers in the world, then I end with complains of my own. Maybe, and this is one hell of a hypothesis, writing is just too personal and when you sit to write, the only thing that you can write about is the suffering you go through. The idea of writing itself is about suffering. I remember, once I was going through the epilogue of a Stephen King book (I think it was dreamcatcher). He had written that he suffered a lot while writing this book, and his sufferings were inadvertently passed on into the character and the storyline. Well, guess that’s what happens with me and the millions of bloggers. Maybe, when we sit to write, we suffer and remember all the suffering and write about them. Ha…..I have become good in understanding people. (:P). Maturity is not a curse then. Hmmmm…..need to think about it and write about it.

[P.S. the last few lines were on a happy note….cos I got a call from someone special and it made me forget a lot of pain…and it helped me write something joyful and merry. The person I am truly in lve with…..]

Enjoy and Rock on…..Abheet.

Btw, was listening to the soundtrack of "Garden State" while writing this piece. Awesome songs. go listen to them and defintely see the movie. Zach Braff and Natalie Portman. My fav romantic movie till date.